Friday... again

Yay, it's Friday! Dance and cavort!

In other news: You are one day closer to death today.

As you were.

Swissjames located

He thought he could run. He thought he could hide. He probably thought lots of things I didn't think of.

He thought he had escaped.

He thought wrong...

Think of yourself as a boulder...

On bureaucratic language...

...Use nouns rather than verbs. Avoid action verbs. They convey movement, and movement is antithetical to the bureaucratic mind. Think of yourself as a boulder standing in the way of your reader’s goal, not as a swinging door through which any dolt can pass.

Brilliant!

Full article here.

Suicidal Cyclist

Pootling down the road the other evening returning from uni at about 7:30, I turned off the main road near my house onto a side street. This is a narrow little thing with people parked in inconvenient places intermittently down the road; it turns the street into a slalom course...

Annnnyway: I was approaching a roundabout (read: painted lump in the road with a sign sticking out of it) had just looked for oncoming traffic on the right and was about to accelerate through the roundabout when one of those unexpected things happened.

Some complete fucking loony on a pushbike (with no helmet or light) came flying down the hill on the left and cut through the wrong side of the roundabout onto my side of the road. I braked then released, swerved to my right then braked again. The fuckwit cyclist had a big wobble and nearly plowed into the front of my car (he missed by about a foot)then continued up the road with me shaking my head in disbelief shouting after him, 'What the fuck do you think you're doing?'

I don't think he knew.

The lucky fucker. Things could've ended very badly for him if he had encountered someone with slower reflexes. If I hadn't have swerved, he would have gone straight into my windscreen.

Don’t get complacent: drive like everyone else on the road is a complete tool.